Monthly Archives: November 2014

“The Negro Homo-Shame”

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“The Negro Homo-Shame”.

Before you even begin to think this article is going to be filled with disparagingly, unfavorable, remarks towards the people in the LGBT community; I would strongly advise you to be like Brand Nubian and “Slow Down.” As a matter of fact, if you’re taking the time to read this article (thank you btw!) what I have to address might just be for you. As a social commentator, blogger, and future author, I run across all kinds of different trends, styles, and stay up-to-date on current social and political events. If I read an article or watch a video that interest me, I immediately give my honest (and sometimes informed) opinion and I keep it moving like U-Haul trucks. And of course you’ll have people who will like what you’ve said, question what you’ve said, or disagree with what you’ve said. All of the three, I am completely fine with. However, when it comes to discussing pivotal issues involving the lives’ of African-Americans, there seems to be an unofficial code of conduct that we all must think the same because you’re black. Now if you were to venture out and break this code—by having your own opinion—you might as well declare yourself an enemy of black America because you’ve just became a sell-out. You become a sell-out if you simply say anything to black America about black America or as some people put it “throwing your race under the bus.” For instance, if you were to speak critical about anything involving hip-hop, murder rates amongst blacks, the lack of black unity, ghetto culture, anything that goes against the narrative of victimization; you are immediately met with a bevy of insults and expletives. You’re called a self-hater; your mother should be ashamed of you (note: this only happens when people think you’re generalizing all black women) and you’re repeating white supremacist ideology and rhetoric. While all of these things are sure enough to happen to you in a conversation or in a post on social media; there is one insult that seems to trump them all (or at least that’s what the intent is). I call it: “Negro Homo Shaming.”

I must submit to you that when I thought of the term “homo-shaming” it was when I heard about the story involving actor-singer, Tyrese Gibson, and famed Wild-N-Out comedian, Spanky Hayes. What happened in this story is seems to be quite common these days when again, for whatever reason, there is faction of black heterosexual (allegedly) dudes who think it’s okay to shame another person by calling them gay. Such is the case when a few weeks ago comedian Spanky Hayes insinuated that Gibson performed gay sexual acts on an executive to receive the lead role in John Singleton’s movie, “Baby Boy.” Now when I first heard about this I immediately knew it wasn’t true because I’ve seen countless interviews with the film’s director [Singleton] in which he stated that the movie was originally written for rapper-actor, Tupac Shakur. It was only after when Shakur passed away that Singleton offered Gibson the lead role. But with that being said, why would a grown man (who goes by the name of Spanky btw) tell such a heinous lie in an attempt to slander another man? Well according to reports, he did it for “attention” and publicity and despite having no way of proving Tyrese is gay; he just made it up because he felt like it. I know some of you right now are wondering where I’m going with this story but trust me I’m going to get to my point. I know some of you might think I’m jumping into phone booths only to emerge as a caped-crusader with the letters L.G.B.T. across my chest, lol! I assure you that is NOT the case! However, it is because of the spanky’s of the world who feel in order to diss or shame someone; you do it by calling them gay, f-boy, or f-n-word. I mean, I was seeing these grotesque words used so much in the blogosphere it was literally making me sick—or so I thought. Not only do these “spankies” call you all kinds of homosexual slurs; but nowadays, these spankies go into graphic, sexually explicit details! And all of this done by (allegedly) heterosexual black males; who if you speak about the social ills in the black community; whether it be rap music, black crime, ghetto culture anything that brings shame towards black folk; you’re a faggot. Also, before I move on, I would be remissed if I didn’t mention that black women have also been guilty of homo-shaming as well. Again, for the sista who might be reading this and thinking “he’s making a blanket statement about black women,” trust me I’m not. But in black women’s defense, I’ve yet to hear them be so explicit in describing certain acts in a way to demean someone; so this is really exclusively targeted towards addressing black men. So p.s., thank you for not rolling your eyes ladies!

0

But seriously folks, the reason why I wrote this article is because have we really made the homosexual the “standard” of shame and ignominy? Look, I would be the first one to tell you that I disagree with the lifestyle so go ahead and just call me some black Christian conservative (no republican or democrat here) who agrees with traditional marriage. Although, I could counter by saying being a “black” Christian these days is more controversial but that’s another story for another day. But as of November 2014, 36 states have recognized same-sex marriage in the United States. So regardless how you or I may feel consciously or have some conviction about this subject; America has nearly embraced this controversial lifestyle with tolerant arms. A lifestyle or being more politically correct, a “sexual orientation,” that has inadvertently affected us one way or another. I have family members who adhere to that way of life and yet I love them despite my own personal beliefs. Yes, there was a time when I scoffed at and even ridiculed gay people until the struggle hit home personally. But with that said; don’t get it twisted. I still call out some of this metrosexual dressing, black male emasculating, wearing skirts like its proper-like nonsense I see being promoted by rappers and NBA basketball players. But that’s just the man in me and will continue to be until the day I kiss the dirt. But I guess my point is, because many of us have family members who endorse this lifestyle then who are we to make it the definitive demarcation of absolute shame? I understand (especially as a black man) how the stigma of being gay in the black community and how real that life is. There are several factors (both socially and religiously) that play into this extreme distain of a lifestyle–or is it? It seems like it was all good just a week ago when you wanted the gay dude to direct your choir or “preeeaaach” that sermon. And ladies, you seem to have no problem befriending these people and having them accessorize everything from your hair, nails, to your latest outfit. But y’all didn’t hear that from me though. Heck, I can remember growing up watching the television series “In Living Color,” where they had several sets of men either dressing like women or men (Damon Wayans and David Alan Grier) playing roles as homosexual “menz” themselves. You don’t even want me to mention how much of this homo-shaming is prevalent in hip-hop music; both past AND present. Yet you still have a segment of black men who if they don’t like what you say, are quick to tell you suck this or eat that like Negro are you for real? All of this because you can’t elocute your words when you disagree with someone?  Well, if that’s the case, the next time you run into your gay family member and lie to yourself by saying “those people are fags but you’re cool because you’re family.” There are a cluster of issues in which the African-American community can and should be ashamed about these days; I just don’t think a sexual preference or attraction should no longer be one of them. Just remember when you “homo-shame” other people; you’re really talking about someone you know as well.

Peace and love y’all.

“The Negro Homo-Shame”

Uncategorized, , , , ,

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Before you even begin to think this article is going to be filled with disparagingly, unfavorable, remarks towards the people in the LGBT community; I would strongly advise you to be like Brand Nubian and “Slow Down.” As a matter of fact, if you’re taking the time to read this article (thank you btw!) what I have to address might just be for you. As a social commentator, blogger, and future author, I run across all kinds of different trends, styles, and stay up-to-date on current social and political events. If I read an article or watch a video that interest me, I immediately give my honest (and sometimes informed) opinion and I keep it moving like U-Haul trucks. And of course you’ll have people who will like what you’ve said, question what you’ve said, or disagree with what you’ve said. All of the three, I am completely fine with. However, when it comes to discussing pivotal issues involving the lives’ of African-Americans, there seems to be an unofficial code of conduct that we all must think the same because you’re black. Now if you were to venture out and break this code—by having your own opinion—you might as well declare yourself an enemy of black America because you’ve just became a sell-out. You become a sell-out if you simply say anything to black America about black America or as some people put it “throwing your race under the bus.” For instance, if you were to speak critical about anything involving hip-hop, murder rates amongst blacks, the lack of black unity, ghetto culture, anything that goes against the narrative of victimization; you are immediately met with a bevy of insults and expletives. You’re called a self-hater; your mother should be ashamed of you (note: this only happens when people think you’re generalizing all black women) and you’re repeating white supremacist ideology and rhetoric. While all of these things are sure enough to happen to you in a conversation or in a post on social media; there is one insult that seems to trump them all (or at least that’s what the intent is). I call it: “Negro Homo Shaming.”

I must submit to you that when I thought of the term “homo-shaming” it was when I heard about the story involving actor-singer, Tyrese Gibson, and famed Wild-N-Out comedian, Spanky Hayes. What happened in this story is seems to be quite common these days when again, for whatever reason, there is faction of black heterosexual (allegedly) dudes who think it’s okay to shame another person by calling them gay. Such is the case when a few weeks ago comedian Spanky Hayes insinuated that Gibson performed gay sexual acts on an executive to receive the lead role in John Singleton’s movie, “Baby Boy.” Now when I first heard about this I immediately knew it wasn’t true because I’ve seen countless interviews with the film’s director [Singleton] in which he stated that the movie was originally written for rapper-actor, Tupac Shakur. It was only after when Shakur passed away that Singleton offered Gibson the lead role. But with that being said, why would a grown man (who goes by the name of Spanky btw) tell such a heinous lie in an attempt to slander another man? Well according to reports, he did it for “attention” and publicity and despite having no way of proving Tyrese is gay; he just made it up because he felt like it. I know some of you right now are wondering where I’m going with this story but trust me I’m going to get to my point. I know some of you might think I’m jumping into phone booths only to emerge as a caped-crusader with the letters L.G.B.T. across my chest, lol! I assure you that is NOT the case! However, it is because of the spanky’s of the world who feel in order to diss or shame someone; you do it by calling them gay, f-boy, or f-n-word. I mean, I was seeing these grotesque words used so much in the blogosphere it was literally making me sick—or so I thought. Not only do these “spankies” call you all kinds of homosexual slurs; but nowadays, these spankies go into graphic, sexually explicit details! And all of this done by (allegedly) heterosexual black males; who if you speak about the social ills in the black community; whether it be rap music, black crime, ghetto culture anything that brings shame towards black folk; you’re a faggot. Also, before I move on, I would be remissed if I didn’t mention that black women have also been guilty of homo-shaming as well. Again, for the sista who might be reading this and thinking “he’s making a blanket statement about black women,” trust me I’m not. But in black women’s defense, I’ve yet to hear them be so explicit in describing certain acts in a way to demean someone; so this is really exclusively targeted towards addressing black men. So p.s., thank you for not rolling your eyes ladies!

0

But seriously folks, the reason why I wrote this article is because have we really made the homosexual the “standard” of shame and ignominy? Look, I would be the first one to tell you that I disagree with the lifestyle so go ahead and just call me some black Christian conservative (no republican or democrat here) who agrees with traditional marriage. Although, I could counter by saying being a “black” Christian these days is more controversial but that’s another story for another day. But as of November 2014, 36 states have recognized same-sex marriage in the United States. So regardless how you or I may feel consciously or have some conviction about this subject; America has nearly embraced this controversial lifestyle with tolerant arms. A lifestyle or being more politically correct, a “sexual orientation,” that has inadvertently affected us one way or another. I have family members who adhere to that way of life and yet I love them despite my own personal beliefs. Yes, there was a time when I scoffed at and even ridiculed gay people until the struggle hit home personally. But with that said; don’t get it twisted. I still call out some of this metrosexual dressing, black male emasculating, wearing skirts like its proper-like nonsense I see being promoted by rappers and NBA basketball players. But that’s just the man in me and will continue to be until the day I kiss the dirt. But I guess my point is, because many of us have family members who endorse this lifestyle then who are we to make it the definitive demarcation of absolute shame? I understand (especially as a black man) how the stigma of being gay in the black community and how real that life is. There are several factors (both socially and religiously) that play into this extreme distain of a lifestyle–or is it? It seems like it was all good just a week ago when you wanted the gay dude to direct your choir or “preeeaaach” that sermon. And ladies, you seem to have no problem befriending these people and having them accessorize everything from your hair, nails, to your latest outfit. But y’all didn’t hear that from me though. Heck, I can remember growing up watching the television series “In Living Color,” where they had several sets of men either dressing like women or men (Damon Wayans and David Alan Grier) playing roles as homosexual “menz” themselves. You don’t even want me to mention how much of this homo-shaming is prevalent in hip-hop music; both past AND present. Yet you still have a segment of black men who if they don’t like what you say, are quick to tell you suck this or eat that like Negro are you for real? All of this because you can’t elocute your words when you disagree with someone?  Well, if that’s the case, the next time you run into your gay family member and lie to yourself by saying “those people are fags but you’re cool because you’re family.” There are a cluster of issues in which the African-American community can and should be ashamed about these days; I just don’t think a sexual preference or attraction should no longer be one of them. Just remember when you “homo-shame” other people; you’re really talking about someone you know as well.

Peace and love y’all.


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My Thoughts Pending The Michael Brown Verdict…

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As America eagerly waits for the seemingly most anticipated verdict since the O.J. Simpson trial; there still seems to be something that’s quite unsettling with me. Many expect that the officer in question, Darren Wilson, will not be indicted for the killing of the unarmed teenager Michael Brown, but my question is “what if he is indicted?” Yes, it might just satisfy the taste of vengeance and retribution for black people everywhere who have been unfavorably treated wrong in some regards to racism and oppression in America. I’m sure it will serve as justice regarding the deaths of Sean Bell, Trayvon Martin and Eric Gardner. Yet does this case, and others like it, address the critical issue(s) that still permeate our communities? I’m not the one to give racism or white supremacy a pass; however, it seems like just as I’ve mentioned before in my initial article “The Failure At Ferguson,” black people have repeatedly been advocates when the picture is painted as us being “victims.” Yes, there’s certainly times when black people have been “victims” simply because of racism and what I call; “unadulterated human hate,” which has been inflicted towards black people in America. There are several examples of this; most notably when it comes down to filling out an application for employment and you just happen to be black. However, what I take exception to is when African-Americans can’t admit to the same level of temerity and indignation towards each other; and pass it off as if white folks taught us how to hate. I know, I know, I know, Malcolm X had a monumental speech dealing with this subject; however, that was during the time when white supremacy and hatred was at its peak overtly. I know you can point to the lot that black people have been given in this country since the slave trade. But I can also point to the various examples of not only self hate, but self defeatism and a glorification of “ghetto culture” and niggertivity. Just let the latter part of that sentence sink in like quick sand ladies and gentlemen. My point is, will black America recognize just like our great, great, grandparents did back in the day that, “we’s all we got?” Or will we continue to point the proverbial finger towards white supremacy so much so that this doctrine has become as popular and lucrative as the “Prosperity Gospel” found in black churches. The reason why I’ve linked the black preacher and the pro-black nationalists/separatist is because I hear the same rationale which looks to empower black people but in reality never really changes the conditions of black people. It’s your typical “feel good, fist pump, charismatic hallelujah a-men to ashe,” message that on one hand tells you about having your own economic base; yet the only people you see benefit is the leaders themselves. Sure you’ll have a select few, but for the most part you have to do it their way, how they do it–for a small fee I might add. Now before you go off and say “Pro-Blacks don’t do that” type of argument compared to black ministers; I would kindly tell you you’re right–ideologically that is. However, I put them in the same category because “Knowledge of Self” has become a hustle and just like many black preachers; it only pacifies the issues in our community by saying all we need is “knowledge” and then we’ll get the money. These meetings has done nothing but more to enlighten us “spiritually” than it has secured us financially. While at the same time making us fundamentally obese with knowledge and teaching; but morally bankrupt when it comes to having character when dealing with one another. Don’t get me wrong, having an economic base or practicing group economics, would help exponentially in solving a litany of issues in black America (one being unemployment amongst black men). Yet, the reason why I did this post is because what has happened surrounding Michael Brown’s family: in particularly his mother. It’s a shame that I have to do this but what I have to say is in NO WAY to disrespect or cast aspersions towards Michael Brown’s mother, Lesley McSpadden. Nevertheless, it points to the core that I see more often to why black people can’t seemingly come together; outside of racism that is. For the record, i’m not totally upset with how the incident went down involving McSpadden and her ex-husband’s mother-in-law, Pearlie Gordon. It further points to an inherently get over or forget your feelings mentality that many of us black folks know exists. So when you talk about having an economic base, black pride, give your money to God and white supremacy; well how can we when we’ve sipped from the bottle of self-hatred and a sick form of hood capitalism that makes the thug, the hustler, and the bootlegger not only pervasive, but have “status” in the black community. And we wonder why black Americans are leery when it comes to dealing or even having black businesses in our communities because of this ghetto/get over mentality.This is commonly referred to as “crabs in a barrel syndrome,” however, we now have black apologists pointing to the barrel instead of the mentality we have harnessed for several decades. ***Sigh*** because yet again racism white supremacy not only created this mentality (which I will agree to in some regard) but it continues to hold an iron fist and preserve it’s influence it in ALL of our current affairs (which I don’t agree with)? So the barrel made Pearlie Gordon sell those t-shirts (without permission btw) in tribute to her deceased grandson for a respectable cause? I think many of you might know the answer to that; but i’ll digress for now. To be perfectly clear, i’m not saying there “ain’t or isn’t” any black entrepreneurs who’s contributing to the black community. I’m just saying it isn’t enough of those businesses to control a predominantly black community either. I also must point out that there’s some influential voices on both sides of the “do better” spectrum whether it resides in pulpit on Sunday mornings or gathers at your neighborhood African bookstore. I guess my inquisitive thoughts are slowly leading me to ponder that when it comes to the core of black issues, you can only speak to the pot which holds the food; but you just aren’t allowed to stir the ‘core’ ingredients in the pot to make it all better. Because then, maybe then, we’ll actually taste something we or most of us (realistically speaking), can have the fortitude to swallow. It’s called the truth. Peace and love y’all.


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